Teenage Addendum -- Fun

I didn't mention a very important part of teaching teenage boys, mostly because I'm still learning the concept myself. One thing that helps with teenage boys is to make sure they have fun.

This is difficult in a traditional martial arts dojo where the concept of "fun" is the repetition and perfection of techniques and challenging yourself to perform better than the class before. Very few adults have the patience for this kind of training -- let alone teenage boys. I can tell them that the process of training is the most important part -- that the "way" in which you do everything is just as important as what you are doing --- but they don't want to hear that, nor should they. They're not ready for that yet.

What they want and need -- is to have their minds engaged. One way to do that is to make sure they are having fun. Not fun through joking or messing around. But fun through movement and challenge.

The other night I had an opportunity to work with one of the more difficult students in our class -- he most likely has a severe case of ADHD. I don't ask, mostly because it doesn't matter -- in the dojo -- we train, regardless of who you are or what you come in with.

On previous occasions this particular student stretched me to my limits. He would make up his own "kata" in the middle of serious practice, he would turn the other way while the head instructor was giving instruction, and would overtly laugh or giggle when the instructor would give him corrections directly. I'm sure every student in the dojo has secretly dreamed of putting this kid in his place.

Ok -- back to my story. The other night I had an opportunity to work with this particular student. However, prior to showing up at the dojo I had been thinking about him and thinking about how our Sensei responds to this student who has been by far the most challenging I have seen in my short 10 years. What I realized is that when all the other students are fuming (myself included) at the kid's behaviour, our instructor is always calm and good natured with him. So before class the other day, I decided that I would try a different tact if I had the opportunity to work out with the student. Low and behold -- the opportunity presented itself.

Class was class -- we maybe did a few things that the student had not been exposed to before -- but nothing uncharacteristic of what would be in a typical class -- what was different was my attitude. As soon as my attitude changed -- the kid changed. I had decided that I was going to have fun working out with him. What ended up happening is that he had fun too. We had a great time workout together. And during that time -- he was focused and respectful -- well 90% of time which is light years ahead of where he was.

It taught me something. It taught me a different way to connect with him and teach him. I only have my instructor's patience -- both for myself and for the teenager to thank.